Waiting...

August 31, 2007, the Avila's officially started the adoption process. On September 4th, 2008, we received our referral for our precious, chubby-cheeked, little Tariku. He was three months old and we thought, for sure, we'd have him home by Christmas. Now he is just over 14 months old and we are still waiting for news, a court date or something. Things are moving and people are getting court dates and passing and we are waiting. So I go in phases of strong faith, doubt, anger and sadness. (You can throw in a little bitterness and envy--when I read people's complaints that their court date isn't sooner....they'll have to wait a week). And I know I am probably not even the longest running adoption out there, even though I'm probably close.
My Bible opened to Hebrews 12--the discipline chapter. I taught some of theses scriptures to Alex; but never knew it wasn't talking necessarily strictly discipline, but teaching.
"My son, do not make light of the Lord's teaching (discipline), and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord teaches those he loves...No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful, Later on however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Encouraging, I know He is working on me, but discouraging, b/c He could work on me FOREVER! I do appreciate prayers for us and our friends, the Scott's, who are going through this too. I know He has promised me that He will bring this to pass and that He will be our son, I am just fatigued and tired of waiting.
Here is more scripture that God has been showing me...
"For the revelation waits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay....but the righteous will live by faith" Hab. 2:3-4
"May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed. We will shout for joy when you are victorious and will lift up our banners in the name of our God. May the LORD grant all your requests...Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God" Psalm 20 (all of its good!) And boy, will I EVER! When I get that call saying "You've passed!" I will be praising God all over the place!

There are so many more, but God has been faithful to bless me with His Word and my many, encouraging sisters in Christ. Thank you!

Lila's Prayer

The past few weeks (and months) I have been in the Word and praying a lot. Usually prayer brings me to tears, either sad, longing tears, or overwhelmingly blessed tears. Well, the other day, we were getting ready to eat lunch and Lila prayed, "Father God, Please bring Titus home soon so mamma will put down her Bible and stop crying." I just thought that was so cute! I have got so much to tell you about what God has been showing me, but I will leave you with a verse God showed me after one of my morning prayer-tear fests. Almost word-for-word what I have been praying specifically these past two months.

Psalm 10:17-18

"O Lord, You have heard the desire of the humble. You will strengthen their hearts. You will incline you ear to vindicate the orphan and the oppressed."

By the way, things are moving and I am expectant God is going to do some amazing things soon! Keep praying!

Blessings

"Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus, so that with one accord you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ." Romans 15:5

Remember how I told you how amazing Colorado was and how much God had blessed us during that trip (and that I would fill you in later)? Well, here it goes. We have a numerous amount of friends from college that now live in Colorado. A very special couple to us, Drew and Noelle, moved there after college and we were really hoping to visit them while there. While they were at KU, they went to Grace EPC and Drew and Vince were classmates. When we describe them, it usually consists of: encouragers, full of joy, on fire for Christ, authentic and sincere. We didn't get to spend a lot of time with them while they were at KU, because we had a family and they were very involved in Greek and college life, but we just adored them.
In December, they had called us and said they had some news for us and we quickly asked "Are you pregnant?" (We can't wait for them to have kids!) They said no and that they would just send it in a letter. Well, no letter came, ever. We just thought if it was big enough news, we would have got something, but we were still asking eachother about it every month or so.
Six months later, on our way to Colorado, we called hoping to catch a time we could meet and they were going to be going to Ottawa/Lawrence for a wedding. What timing! So we decided that on our way back we would meet them in Salina, at IHOP for an early morning breakfast. After 6 years, we finally got to see our friends again, and what an encouragement it was to us! They shared with us that Noelle's brother had been adopted and what a huge blessing that was to their family and that her family had started an adoption family foundation...and we were the first recepients of their adoption gift. I can't tell you how much this blessed Vince and I. I cried and they prayed for us and we departed. Some thoughts as I was in the car were: 1) God didn't let them send it in the mail, because we needed this encouragement now, after nearly 2 years of waiting; that God was still providing for us, 2) We needed to bless eachother in person and a letter wouldn't have sufficed and 3) This had to happen before we got Tariku. We were supposed to get him in December and yet, this still hasn't happened. To feel our sisters and brothers in Christ, come alongside us, supporting and praying for us....just overwhelming to me. We felt so loved.

The Vision

I have felt compelled to share this for a few days. I didn't think I would, but this is a huge part of my adoption journey for my son, and if this encourages you and glorifies God, than it is all worth it!

This adoption process has been harder and longer than I could have ever imagined. We started in September 2007, was referred to our son Sept. 4, 2008 and will be blessed to get him home by Sept. of 2009. I have prayed specifically for 2 things throughout these past 2 years: 1) that God would use this adoption to bring me closer to Him (previous loss in my life had really hindered my vulnerability to God) and 2) that I would see God's hand and presence all throughout our adoption. He has, without a doubt, been faithful to answer these two things, and I don't think He is done yet! I have felt and seen God move in numerous ways; through my friends, through prayer, through provision. It has blown me away and brought me back to a place where I just want to be with Him all the time. But my heart has ached deeply for Tariku to be placed in my arms; for this to be brought to completion. I want to kiss his face and feel his embrace so much, tears come to my eyes just thinking about it.
Five Tuesdays ago, Pam called with her weekly update, which is usually nothing, but at least she calls to tell me "no news". I was tired and angry. I kept asking her questions to which she had nothing, and I was sick of this--not her fault, but this was where I was at emotionally and physically. So we hung up and I start cleaning because my friend was coming over. As I was cleaning the downstairs, I stood up, and immediately, a smile came to my face and God gave me a vision that we had received the call that we passed court. I felt a tangible weight of anxiety and uncertainty leave me and this longing that I had for my son was filled--HE WAS MINE! I was filled with peace and I know that in God's calendar, He gave Titus to me that day. Of course, almost six weeks has passed and we are hoping for a court date very soon, but I haven't been going nuts since that day. I am clinging to the promise God gave me that day. It will happen and He will be the One providing our son.
God has been faithful to reveal even more of Himself to me. I was reading yesterday about Abraham and his faith in regards to God giving him a son. Romans 4:20-21 "Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised."

I appreciate prayers on our behalf as we wait for God to bring about what He has given us.

Colorado Vacation

The Avila's headed to Colorado for a wonderful and much needed vacation. We went to attend our good friends' wedding located close to Telluride. We went to Denver to see some old college buddies. While there we hiked around Red Rocks.








We then headed to Colorado Springs to see Focus on the Family "Whit's End", Garden of the Gods, Pike's Peak (Vince was sweating driving up that mountain), and Cave of the Winds. We also saw the Royal Gorge and the Air Force base. Every time I go to Colorado, I am just amazed at how creative our God is and how good He is to give us beautiful things to look at. I see design stamped all over creation. If you go through Garden of the God's and see all the rocks that look remarkably like two camels kissing, a Scotsman, and Indian, a sleeping giant and many others, I mean "COULD GOD MAKE IT ANY MORE CLEAR!" I love Colorado! I have so many things to say about our trip to Colorado and how much God truly blessed our time while we were there, but I will save it for another post.

Alex's Birthday

Waaaayyy late on this blog for Alex's 10th birthday, but better late than never. We had 3 of her closest friends, Kiran (a star-wars warrior), Mandy who is Miss Personality, and sweet Libby. They had a blast eating dogs, swimming in the spa, climbing on Nana and Papa's roof and playing spy. A perfect day for Alex! Grandma made a green and white checkerboard cake and Alex got beautiful clothes, Jedi weapons, legos, softball gear and more.

A cabin, friends and a squirrel

A couple of weeks ago, my wonderful friend Dianne invited me and the girls to go down to Lake of the Ozarks to stay at her Grandparents' cabin. She knew I needed a relaxing getaway where I could be a fun mom and not think about the lack of news from Ethiopia. With our five girls, we made it to the lake house, which is a quaint A-frame house about 12 steps from the water. We walked in and as Dianne was pulling the curtains open, she noticed a big pile of chewed up door frame. Something had been eating the house up! I went upstairs, hoping to find at the most, a DEAD rodent, but instead, as I was about to open the curtains, the girls behind me started screaming and above my head, a furry squirrel ran across the valance. This was just the beginning...We tried and tried to get him out. That night we stayed at a hotel. The next day the varment catcher came and told us "He has to be gone, I've checked everywhere". Well, apparently not, because later that afternoon, while I was upstairs, all five girls and a previously rodent-scarred momma were all screaming a crying downstairs. The little booger had ran through all their feet and clothes. We all made it safely outside and the girls were screaming at us, "Don't make us go back there, I want to go home"...and from Lila "This is the most hooorrrible vacation ever! I mean, WHO lives at a place where the doors are all chewed out, there's mulch on the floor and a SQUIRREL'S running around???" I couldn't keep myself from laughing. So we stayed outside and comforted the girls by roasting smores and praying. That night, we spied him on top of the valance again. While the girls were shut in the Tahoe (by that time, they wouldn't get out), I told Dianne I would go upstairs, open the door and try to beat it outside with a broom. She said "I got your back with the light". Now, this whole time I am picturing this squirrel jumping on my face and biting me. I slowly walked across the room and opened the door, watching the squirrels every move. I stepped back and proceeded to beat and scream at the squirrel to leave. It shot down the curtain and then flew up over my head. Good thing the girls where in the car, b/c I said some things that mommies should never say. By the time I was done screaming every word in the book, Dianne had ran downstairs and outside, shining the light on me from the porch. She had never laughed so hard in her life. I was just plain mad at that stupid squirrel. That night we slept at the neighbor's house. The following night Fred and Vince drove up and we all slept in the cabin. Vince, Haley, Lila and I slept on 2 twin beds that were pushed together. Lila elbowed me in the face, pulled my hair out and 2 other times would sit up straight and claw the air, growling "NO, UH, RRRR". She was busy fighting squirrels all night in her dreams.
It wasn't the most relaxing vacation, but I did have a blast with my girls and we will definitely be telling this story the rest of our lives.