The Vision

I have felt compelled to share this for a few days. I didn't think I would, but this is a huge part of my adoption journey for my son, and if this encourages you and glorifies God, than it is all worth it!

This adoption process has been harder and longer than I could have ever imagined. We started in September 2007, was referred to our son Sept. 4, 2008 and will be blessed to get him home by Sept. of 2009. I have prayed specifically for 2 things throughout these past 2 years: 1) that God would use this adoption to bring me closer to Him (previous loss in my life had really hindered my vulnerability to God) and 2) that I would see God's hand and presence all throughout our adoption. He has, without a doubt, been faithful to answer these two things, and I don't think He is done yet! I have felt and seen God move in numerous ways; through my friends, through prayer, through provision. It has blown me away and brought me back to a place where I just want to be with Him all the time. But my heart has ached deeply for Tariku to be placed in my arms; for this to be brought to completion. I want to kiss his face and feel his embrace so much, tears come to my eyes just thinking about it.
Five Tuesdays ago, Pam called with her weekly update, which is usually nothing, but at least she calls to tell me "no news". I was tired and angry. I kept asking her questions to which she had nothing, and I was sick of this--not her fault, but this was where I was at emotionally and physically. So we hung up and I start cleaning because my friend was coming over. As I was cleaning the downstairs, I stood up, and immediately, a smile came to my face and God gave me a vision that we had received the call that we passed court. I felt a tangible weight of anxiety and uncertainty leave me and this longing that I had for my son was filled--HE WAS MINE! I was filled with peace and I know that in God's calendar, He gave Titus to me that day. Of course, almost six weeks has passed and we are hoping for a court date very soon, but I haven't been going nuts since that day. I am clinging to the promise God gave me that day. It will happen and He will be the One providing our son.
God has been faithful to reveal even more of Himself to me. I was reading yesterday about Abraham and his faith in regards to God giving him a son. Romans 4:20-21 "Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised."

I appreciate prayers on our behalf as we wait for God to bring about what He has given us.